RDTRN Archive - RDT Right Now #132

RDT Right Now #132

From: RDT Right Now <rdtrn@torithoughts.org>
Date: Fri, 27 Feb 1998 22:55:14 -0800
Subject: RDT Right Now #132
To: violet@slip.net

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o REALLY DEEP THOUGHTS (RIGHT NOW) #132 Friday, February 27, 1998 . o - O - O - O - O - O - O - O - o . o o . o o O "Thoughts right now... O o What will become of me, o o Become of her, become of we?" o . o o . O O O - o - o - o - o - o - o - o - O o . o o o Tori Amos, "Thoughts" In this issue: o-o-o-o-o-o-o * RDTRN SHIRT REMINDER * The Saga of Beemer--the Final Chapter Pretty kitty... Tori Tix, Corn-Porn, Britbashing (and is Tori Mar Tori not confirmed for Australia as yet Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. Admitting You Have A Problem... directed comment Just one thing hyprocritical amoses concerts! Smoking wrong. I'm breathless. Heyyyyyyyyyyy another indy.net'er! RDT 'zine Missed a digest? Pick up a copy at the RDT(RN) archives: http://www.slip.net/~violet/archives/Thoughts_archive.html ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o * RDTRN SHIRT REMINDER * There are 2 days left to get your order in the mail. Orders *must* be postmarked no later than Sunday, March 1st. Don't miss out. If you don't know what I'm talking about, either ask me or check out the RDTRN site: http://www.slip.net/~violet/archives/Thoughts_archive.html Don't hesitate to ask me for help. :) (Remember, I'm happy to send JPEGs and other info to folks who don't have Web access.) Violet xoxox ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [Note from Violet: Because I'm so behind with digests -- because I was so sick last week and only put out two digests -- I have bumped this post up. I'm not sure when I'll get caught up, and I feel Beth needs support right now, not in a couple of days. I don't know how the rest of you will react, but I spent a good deal of time actually crying after I read this. It truly broke my heart.) [top] Date: Thu, 26 Feb 1998 21:27:02 -0500 From: Beth Coulter <betheqt@voicenet.com> Subject: The Saga of Beemer--the Final Chapter Cc: robinbea@sas.upenn.edu My daughter and I buried Beemer tonight (Thursday) with help from John, fellow EwF. Thanks Sir John. She and I both took a handful of Earth and gently placed it over Beemers body. He looked just like he was sleeping, wrapped up in a blue towel. You see, yesterday Beemer was getting pretty bad. His lucid moments made him seem almost well, but they were very short-lived. His breathing was raspy and labored. He refused to eat, and although he looked longingly at his water bottle, he did not have the strength to suck the water out. I had to squeeze it into his mouth and he drank so eagerly, looking at me with almost graditude in his little black eyes. Last night, he wanted to be on my shoulder, pressed close to my neck all evening. Even while I was on the comp which he never ever did before. He nuzzeled my neck and ear and in between rasping he was purring. He was so content. My daughter finally came to grips that he was suffering and ok'd euthenasia(sp?). He gave her a rattie kiss and she said good bye instead of good night. Every time I put him in his cage, he stuck his nose so far out it must have been painful. He just wanted to be with me so bad. maybe it was the patcholli. So even though I had to pick up the ex at 5:30 this morning to take him to his surgery (he's doing fine, released tomorrow), I stayed up till about 2:30 till Beemer finally decided to go to sleep. When I returned home at 10 this morning, he was in bad shape. His breathing was so loud, he looked like he was in agony. I picked him up and he crawled up to my shoulder up against my neck and sounded like he was crying. I dialed the number of a vet my therapist knows who told me to bring Beemer in. She would put him to sleep no charge. I got out the tote bag that Beemer always takes trips in and made it all comfy for him. As I was carrying the bag and purse and keys and opening the door, he decided to show me how well he was by trying and almost suceeding in climbing out and falling to the floor. I dropped everything else and sat with Beems. I kissed him on the head and said, "Stop fighting now. It's ok. You don't have to try anymore." He calmed down and I spent the drive with one hand in the bag, Beems chin on my palm and his body splayed out over my fingers. I had a tori concert on and winter and pretty good year were playing for the drive. When we got to the vets, I didn't say a word. Couldn't. Took Beems out of the bag and placed him on my shoulder. He didn't move or make a sound even tho' he was surrounded by cats and dogs. It was like he was oblivious to everything except for my neck. The nurse came out with a carry-all for him and returned moments later with beems on a blue towel. His breathing was slowing and I held him in both hands close to my chest as he took his last breaths. It was very peaceful and he was all curled up looking sound asleep. I thanked the nurse, went to the hospital to check on the ex, then came home and put Beemer in his cage. I left the lid up and covered all but his head. Then I had tons of errands which is why we weren't able to bury Beemer this afternoon. But it was kinda nice in the dark, on the edge of a woods. We put an old piece of granite curbing on top of his grave and it looks like a miniature headstone. I have cried so much today, remembering how sweet and loving he was. I remembered when we first got him in Sept, he was thin and couldn't be handled without gloves. Within a couple of weeks, he was fat and came when he called and chewed every pair of sweats I own from *sleeping* in my lap. He could chew a huge hole so *silently*! When I held him up to my face and asked him, "Rattie Kiss?" he would touch his nose to my lips. I'm glad that my daughter retrieved him from certain death and he became our pet. But he was mostly mine. He loved me as much as I loved him. That was a first in my entire life. Bye Beemer. You were a joy to me. Thanks for all the kind words of support over the past week you guys. It really helped me through this, knowing so many of you care. Thanks. Fairy Blessings, Bethey ---------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm OK when everything's not OK cause it's the Fairies Revenge they say and I have always been a Fairy *************************************************************** --"I'm not going anywhere. So, just, Trust Me." Tori Amos- Rome, Italy; 1994 ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 22 Feb 2000 23:23:50 +1100 From: FadaGurl <lemonpie@psynet.net> Subject: Pretty kitty... *bouncebouncebouncebounce* ohshittshitshithshit I can't stop being hyperactive today!!!!!!! *huge grins* well, to put this delicately... how many times in yer damn life to you get to touch a tiger (white at that)???????????????? Are you guys getting the gist of *why* I'm sooooo over the moon!!??? :) Basically, at one of the theme parks in Queensland, there's a tiger park, and part of the attraction is forking out horrendous amounts of money to get to *sigh* pat the tiger and get shitloads of photos taken with the tiger.... had it done this morning when we went to Dreamworld with the boyf *huuuugesighs* man it was incredible!!!!!!!! A large very very large kitty... *big* rare kitty fairly dangerous kitty wow thank goodness I didnt drink red cordial this morning, or else I would've been "lalalalala whee" all day basically. Also at this theme park was a ride where you basically travel at horrendous speeds with whopping gravitational forces up really really high and then they make you travel backwards alllll the way down 35-ish stories. I know that doesn't sound *too* fascinating (well, not as "wow" as the tiger did anyway) buuut... shit the adrenaline! So yeh, you can kinda guess what kind of mood I'm in at the moment! (hyperactive, yet very very very tired). Sorry I haven't been keeping up with the digests of late. I know there's a huuuge bunch of marvellous people that I want to give hugs to (ie. Jo!!!!!!!!!) but i've been too lazy (ie. busy ie. boyfriend came back to Brisbane after 3 weeks of not seeing him... heh heh). So instead of giving specific hugs to people, Im going to do the random supportive/congrats hugs to everyone. Give yourself a hug from me if you want/need it. Davy davy davy... like I said, every time I read one of your posts, I giggle like a 3 year old (although the fact that I'm a Gemini doesn't mean I have to regress too far back...) I usually wait eagerly for a post (even though I haven't had the patience to read them in full of late) so yeh, I'm like you. And yeh, I'm also slightly worried Tori might turn this new album into YKTR v2.0. Random famblings over. Plus there's the fact I have a fairly large praying mantis staring at me from above my computer about to stalk me from 1 metre away... and I'm toooo chickenshit to do anything about it. So I'm going to shut this computer down quickly and run away. :) Grins and hyperactivity ahoy :) Love ya all Dani. ---- Danielle lemonpie@psynet.net http://www.uq.net.au/~zzdringr "Don't push me cause I'm close to the edge I'm trying not to lose my head It's like a jungle sometimes; it makes me wonder how I keep from going under" Grandmaster Flash, "The Message" ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 05:49:50 EST From: "Stuart Ellershaw" <gbbs29n2@ibmmail.com> Subject: Tori Tix, Corn-Porn, Britbashing (and is Tori Marri ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi guys & guyettes, so it's 10 weeks and counting 'til "From the Choirgirl Hotel" is finally released and our regular two year wait between albums will finally be over. I hope my life doesn't change in the next two years as much as it has since BfP came out, but then in some ways I hope it does so I'm talking rubbish, forgive me? Is it just me or does the album title sound like a live country album - 'Tori Amos - From the Choirgirl Hotel'. I hope she hasn't deserted Rob Plant for Shania Twain! I heard a rumour this week that Tori had married Mark Hawley her British sound engineer, that she was wearing a long flowing blue dress for the ceremony and the people who catered for the event didn't know who she was. This is most probably pre-album hype and foundless rumour but I just wondered if anyone else had heard about this? It's not on The Dent so it can't be true, but if it is then you have great taste in men Tori (Nationality-wise at least). A few quick replies - Audrey ("LITTLE MS. S" <swanstroma@kenyon.edu>), you asked about getting tickets to see Tori in the UK. Well the Manchester Apollo tickets went on sale today (Thursday 26th - solar eclipse day, in Barbados anyway!) so if you post to the list (or email me privately if you like) with the names of the venues you might be able to see Tori in then I'll write you back with their phone numbers. It would be best if you can pay by Visa, American Express or Mastercard (or any other internationally accepted credit card) then you can give them the card number over the phone and the ticket(s) will be yours! They'll keep your ticket(s) safe and sound at the venue's box office for you to pick up on the night of the show. If its not your own credit card that you paid with you'll need to tell the venue who the tickets are actually for then just show some proof of ID when you collect them and hey presto, you'll be seeing Tori in the company of thousands of quiet reserved polite Brits, just like me! Just think - not a 'You rock my world Toriiii!' or 'Myraaa Elleeeen!' screamer within thousands of miles! I booked my tix today - got centre seats four rows from the front at the Manchester Apollo May 21st!!! Hi Jo, I hope you've recovered from your birthday weekend. Good luck getting the Liverpool concert tickets. Are you deliberately choosing all the most picturesque and/or seaside towns to study in? Have you thought about Leeds - there's no distractions to studying there, not a beach or Roman Bath in sight (unless you like shopping, then you should stay well away, your grant would be gone in seconds). I'm still working on your tapes by the way, they're almost done. Oh by the way JoThe (wash your mouth out young lady!), to refer to your post in RDTRN #130 what's 'hard corn-porn' when its at home? You've put disturbing visions in my mind of sweetcorn abuse in the porn world. I bet the poor corns are not so sweet after that experience! 'Hard soft and wet' - I ask you, dis-gusting!! (in my best Mrs Merton voice). Melanie McGrath you should be ashamed! Check out your post box on Saturday Jo - there should be a white Tori-filled package waiting for you. Well Tori herself isn't in it I'm afraid - she was too busy rehearsing with the band to allow me to post her to you. Hey what do you all think Tori should call her backing band, she has to give them a name - Tori Amos and the Fairies? (nah), Tori Amos and the Choirgirls? (no way), Tori Amos and the lucky bastards? (Yeah that's more like it!) Hi Beth Coulter the Britbasher! To show there's no hard feelings I'd like to wish you all the very best in your grant applications. If your compositions are as well written as your posts I'm sure you'll land at least one of them, if not both. Good luck with RDT and RAINN too. Whatever happens we'll all be behind you. Believe you deserve them and visualise yourself winning them, positive thinking works wonders. Well Bill Clinton must be doing something to survive these personal attacks! Will all those irons you have in the fire you can't fail. While I have your attention Beth, thanks for being the honorary mother figure of RDTRN. I hope we'll all be as understanding and undoubtedly hip as you when we're 'mature' parents. You've subbed to a Tori mailing list, how cooler could you possibly get?! Let's hope we're all still here posting and sharing when you're a Grandmother (oh dear that sounds bad - but you know what I mean!) Hey was it you Dave who said Kajagoogoo were one hit wonders? I have a 15 track greatest hits cd of theirs to disprove you! Okay so maybe they didn't gave 15 hits but since when has a small fact like that stopped a record company releasing a Best Of package? Who could forget their classics like "Ooh to be ahh", "Hang on Now", "The Lions Mouth" and my personal fave, "The Big Apple"??? Timeless one and all! (Damn there goes my cred - if I had any to start with) Welcome to the list Sara Orton, and Jack (alexandj@VAX.CS.HSCSYR.EDU) - don't worry you're but a baby compared to some of us Arty Turners. At least I'm just still on the right side of 30, I'm almost catching you up Mr. MikeWhy!! That's all for today. Before I leave, a big Hi to Queen Violet, Nina, Carrie B, Danica, Clare Em, Doug, and anyone else who knows me (Rynn where are you, we miss you! You can't be hibernating until Star Wars 1 comes out, surely!) Stu ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Recipients: IBMMAIL -N0119467 *IBMMAIL.N0119467 ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] From: "Planet Tori" <planettori@geocities.com> Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 12:44:37 +0000 Subject: Tori not confirmed for Australia as yet Gday there all Toriphiles Sister of the Moon wrote: > From: sister of the moon <vsz001@ns1.wmdc.edu> > hi everyone :o) i just managed to finish reading about 150 messages from > tori lists and my eyes are gonna fall out of my head. does anyone know if > tori will be touring australia at any point in june, july or august? i > wanna see her! Don't we all! Unfortunately there has been no announcement yet of Tori doing any AustralAsian Tour dates. USA and European dates have been confirmed (email us privately) but you can rest assured that the moment any dates "Down Under" (Promo Tours or otherwise) are announced, we will tell you :) RDT PLANET TORI (Returning March 1st) http://www.geocities.com/~planettori --------------------------------------------- She's a Beauty Queen, my sweet bean bag in the street Tori Amos... ---------------------------------------------- ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 08:50:14 -0600 From: "ELISABETH EMELIE KLUG" <EEKLUG@coe.edu> Subject: Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. Greetings, and Merry Meet. I haven't really said much to this group yet, but I just had a question for everyone. I may have asked this before, but I don't think that it was posted, at least not to my attention. Here it is: I am a psychology student, and for a class we have to write a paper diagnosing a famous figure, and of course I chose Tori. I know a little about her history of abuse from her lyrics, but was wondering if anyone knew where I could get more information! Thank you all so very much. You are e absolutely wonderful. Beth, I have sent you healing energies. I hope that they help you overcome your loss. Toodles, Elisabeth "The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace things but burn, burn, burn like a fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everyone goes 'Aww!'" -Jack Keruac ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] From: AGelfling@aol.com Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 10:48:22 EST To: betheqt@voicenet.com Cc: rdtrn@torithoughts.org Subject: Admitting You Have A Problem... Wow, Bethey, that was the sweetest thing I've ever received in email. I mean, all these "sweets" referring to me --- surely, you jest. Hey, but it's nice to hear 'em anyway. <wiggles toes happily> As for me and Dougie... go ahead, plan the wedding. We'll just veto anything we don't like. And Dougie --- if we're getting married, do I get to learn about you first? Or are we going to pull a "Dharma & Greg"??? OH! I have an album recommendation! 1200 Curfews from the Indigo Girls! 'Tis great! All my love, Davy *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*- *-*-*-* David Wycislak - agelfling@aol.com - Instant Messenger: agelfling ICQ: 8660144 - NetMeeting: ils5.microsoft.com/agelfling@aol.com And if you still can't contact me, please come out of your cave. "I wait all day for my sailor... And sometimes he comes... See you over hill and dale... Riding on the wind, I see... You know me... You know me like the nightingale... Oh, fair maiden, I see you standing there... Oh, will you hold me for just a fair time... The tune is playing in the fair night... I see you in my dreams... Fair boy your eyes haunt me..." -Song For Eric, Tori Amos ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 16:37:40 +0000 To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org From: "Manda, Zach and Rebekah" <conner@sanasys.com> Subject: directed comment For the Wonderful Bethey, who gave us these words of hope and wisdom in her latest post to RDT(RN): "Within the next 6 months my career will take off or sink. I'm scared to death. I have so many irons in the fire at this point, that I want to believe in myself, that I am truly on my way. I am a finalist for two Literary Grants totaling $80,000, I will find out if I get the editors position at RDT, I find out if RAINN has accepted my book proposal for my story "Upside Down", and a few other ventures. If everything comes through one way or another, I have it made. All I have to do is continue doing my work and the career will follow." Speaking as someone who has read the stories that you posted to The Dent, I must say that I have a lot of faith in you (as far as your talents go). I was moved to tears by all of the stories by you that I read. To me, that is the main point of any work of writing... to make someone feel and think. Stories and essays are supposed to make people see something from a new point of view... to make them reevaluate their way of life... your stories did all of that and more for me. I wish you the very best of luck in everything you are doing right now. I know that we are all just *so* proud of you, Bethey... even those of us who are like myself and don't know you very well. We're in your corner.. rooting for you. "If I should fail to get any, I will feel that is a direct rejection of my dream and that the fates have deemed it so. I don't know if I would ever find the strength to try again. If one thing comes to me and the rest not, then I would know that it will be a struggle to become the legend I wish to be. But my desire is so strong, I would fight that uphill battle until I died trying." You can't let people get you down if they reject your ideas or opinions. People (like me and like you too) have to learn to NOT live our lives around what other people think about us. Everyone bases so much ephasis on what other's think, rather than how we feel about ourselves. It has taken me 16 years to even come as far as *I* have, and believe me, I have a long way to go before I will be able to say that I am living for MYSELF. In the "Little Earthquakes" video, Tori said something about not being hurt when people go, "Thhhhpppppppt". Just because one person doesn't like what you have presented to them or what you have to say, doens't mean the whole world feels that way.... and even if the whole world didn't like what you had to say, at least you would know that were an individual. Keep your chin up. We all love you dearly. "I stand here on the ledge, with no more control of which way I fall, dependant on the prevailing winds. My gut, My Muse tells me, Yes, Now is the time. But that doubting little voice from behind my right ear says, "It's never going to happen. Big Dreamers fall hard. Give it up before you feel hurt." " On the ledge... I have spent most of my life there, as have many people that I know. You can't continue to let yourself feel that you're always going to get hurt. (I wish I could take my own advice, *sigh*). Now *is* the time, baby, now *is* the time. Push yourself to do everything you want to do. Tell that stupid doubting voice to shut up; your Muse is trying to talk! Just remember... The big dreamers live the beautiful lives... They are able to weave themselves into worlds of gold. If you remember and believe that, you will never lose touch with your inspiration and emotion. "I was once a victim, then became a survivor. Now I am trying to be a champion." Bethey, you are truely an inspiration to us all. Keep striving. The gold is not as far from your reach as you may think... --------------------------------------- (Other Stuff) Davy said: >1) How early to get there before the concert to do the soundcheck thing. (one >hour? three hours? go the night before and bring a sleeping bag?) >2) Where to wait to do the soundcheck thing (stage door? loading docks? box >office?) >3) What NOT to bring to give to Tori (all the cats named Easter you can find? >Perrier[rather than Evian]? edible underwear? ) >4) What to do while you're waiting for the concert to start >5) What the souvenirs run for (as in $$$) >6) How to sneak in a DAT recorder <grin> >7) How to get on Joel's good side so you can go backstage (food? money? >sexual promises?) >8) Where to go after the concert (back to the sound check wait area? jump on >the stage and run through? write your phone number repeatedly on Tori's limo >in red permanenet marker?) As someone who has never been to a concert myself, I would love to see some answers to these questions.... and on a related stubject, The Toriphile Registry is so cool! Glad to see that there are other Toriphiles besides me in Iowa!! :)) >*** Shave digest *** lol Good idea. :) Ohhhh one other thing.. how soon will we actually be *getting* our RDT(RN) shirts? (those of us who ordered them) Sorta towards Danica and whoever else takes Accounting.... I don't know how much harder it is in college, but I'm taking it right now (in High School) and I hate it. Bluhhh. Find something you like better for the time being... or a better teacher. I truely believe that the right teacher can make the entire difference between an A student and a B student. *hugs for Danicagirl* Ohhh man am I tired. It's about 4:30 in the afternoon here in sunny Iowa (beautiful weather today, btw) and my eyes are drooping really bad. I'm so tired from staying up late/early all week after work to do homework. *sigh* I'm such a whiner. And now I have to close because I have a dumb city council meeting to go to. Grrr. Take it easy, everyone. Manda --------------------------------- today I dreamed that I was something more than just her shadow -A.P.- "Her Shadow" ---------------------------------- ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 13:21:19 -0500 From: "Paff, Jessica" <jessica.paff@lmco.com> Subject: Just one thing To: "'rdtrn@torithoughts.org'" <rdtrn@torithoughts.org> This really doesn't have anything to do with Tori, and I know that makes me a naughty girl, but I just HAVE to say this to SOMEONE or I will Just explode and there will be little bits of Jessi everywhere, and no one wants that. If any of you ever call technical support for your computer or for software, or if you call EIS or MIS at your comapny....please, Please, PLease, PLEase, PLEAse, PLEASe, PLEASE (!!!!!!!!) Do ***NOT*** Chew food or bubble gum or slurpy things into the phone!!!!! IT is Sosososososososoooooo very yucky. I gotta help ya' with your problem, and I can deal with that....I can reset your passwords, I can reformat your drives, I even clear ya' some server space if ya' really need it....but those lip smackin' noises are so rude and are like nails on a chalkboard....and that makes me wanna scream....and My co workers already have to deal with my normal weirdness without having to deal with me hop outa my chair, smack the MUTE button and do the Icky-pooey dance while yelling "WHAT The Hell are you EATING?!?!?!?!?!?! EEEWWWWWW!!!!!!!" :) ANd just so this isn't TOTALLY devoid of Tori Content, (I had some lovely fruit at lunch by the way), I was listening to CaLS in a friends car with a custom stereo......with like amps and big ole speakers and EQs and CD changers and the like....and WOW, CaLS sounds really good with a LOTTA bass :) happy sunshiny lovinstuf with no slurpins' jessicat ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 16:04:36 -0500 (EST) From: Fragments1@aol.com To: Icicle61@aol.com, rdtrn@torithoughts.org, betheqt@voicenet.com, SmerfCrazy@aol.com Subject: hyprocritical amoses >someone I work with helps her brother out on the weekends as he is a >caterer to the stars (no stars of much relevance to me though usually - >he's done elton john and the likes), and on Sunday, her brother did Tori >Amos's wedding (and my friend helped). ok. look. this hAs got to be said, so i'm saying it: if tori got married, then, as far as i'm concerned, all my faith in her has disappeared. i realize that the way i'm looking at this is going to be very hypocritical and narrow-minded..... but, the point is, i can't change it. tori even once SAID that she didn't BELIEVE in marriage for the simple reason that I agree with-it's simply another part of the church's control over who we can or can't be with. and..it's like..i don't know. tori is just......it's like-did she ever even UNDERSTAND the depths she was getting into with what she was singing about? has she ever even been silent? it's like she admitted in an interview once....with eric, she always left the stage, after [supposedly] pouring her heart out, to be held by a guy.... she just...damn it! i can't put it into words..but i feel betrayed. i do. maybe if i give it time it'll sink in, and i'll understand it. but it's like..i just don't know! i guess now i know how the madonna folks felt when she had a baby.... it's like..the image is broken. *sigh*..umm..isn't there an ani list somewhere....SHE'S not married yet, is she? .... -ventrue...a very confused, depressed boy who once looked up to miz amos. ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 18:03:16 -0500 To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org From: Mikewhy <mikewhy@iglou.com> Subject: concerts! Davy said in RDTRN #129: >What I'm requesting is that one of you people >who have been an EWF for years, and have been to many MANY concerts, and >>are obvious in your obsessive devotion to spreading the Tori cause (yes, >>I'm talking to YOU, Mikewhy --- but it doesn't have to be you at all), >>make a guide for us concert newbies on how to do the following things: Since the specifics of every tour might be different, it is hard to come up with the guide you requested. My answers to your questions would differ for each the tours I have seen, the LE, UTP, and DDI tours. People did show up for the soundchecks before the shows on the last tour. These soundchecks were usually 3-4 hours before the start of the show. But toward the end of the tour the crowds got so large that Tori could no longer sign anything or give everyone attention. I fear it may be worse this year. I am not sure if there will be the same opportunities, though I am sure Tori would like to communicate with us in some fashion. I expect security to be really tight, and for good reason. Tori said on a Great Expectations radio special that one of the reasons she went to England to work on the GE soundtrack was because she had "a stalker" in America. I have no idea of the details of this, but it is disturbing to say the least. So Joel and her bodyguards may be extra protective this tour. Though they can be extreme, I really do appreciate their efforts to keep Tori safe! The one thing I have heard about that makes me sad are some of the incidents people have told me about at these soundcheck meet and greets. A few people who were about to meet Tori or say something to her were shoved aside or interrupted by others, and as a result they did not get to talk to Tori. That makes me sad that any Toriphile would do that. So I guess I would hope that we would be kind to one another and try not to monopolize Tori's time. Also, if the crowd waiting for Tori is large, it might be a good idea to leave if you have already met her on this tour, to give the others a better chance to talk to her. I also want to comment on the gifts people give Tori. I would think carefully before giving her anything. Although I am sure she loves everything that she gets, she simply does not have the room to lug all that stuff with her from town to town! I think Tori enjoys interesting stories and interesting people more than anything. Since she likes to read, good books are always a nice thing too. 4) What to do while you're waiting for the concert to start Meet other Toriphiles and talk about Tori! 5) What the souvenirs run for (as in $$$) Concert merchandise tends to be pretty expensive. Shirts are usually $20-25, and posters are $10. There is usually a concert program too for $20 or so. 7) How to get on Joel's good side so you can go backstage (food? money? sexual promises?) Listen to him carefully and do what he says! 8) Where to go after the concert Tori tends to be tired after a show, so my personal feeling now is we should either leave her alone at this time, or just wave goodbye as she leaves. ALL IMHO of course! Yours in Tori, Mikewhy ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Michael L. Whitehead mikewhy@iglou.com My Dent In The Tori Amos Net Universe => http://www.aye.net/~mikewhy/toriamos.html "Moses I know, I know you've seen fire, but you've never seen fire until you've seen Pele blow..." Tori Amos ------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 18:03:39 -0500 To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org From: Mikewhy <mikewhy@iglou.com> Subject: Smoking Laura posted in RDT Right Now #129: >Hey guys.. I need some strength! Help me! I 'm trying to quit smoking... >>but it's so hard. I decided to go "cold turkey" But alot of my friends >>aren't supportive of me quiting. One refuses to not smoke around me! Here is a big hug of support from me Laura! Hang in there. You will be unhappy in the short term but very happy in the long term by quitting. I have never smoked, but I have friends who have quit, and they all tell me it was hard, but after a while they NEVER regretted quitting. I am shocked some of your friends are not being supportive. Since second hand smoke is dangerous, I would question any friend who wanted to damage my health. I have asthma that at times gets very severe. I am also allergic to cigarette smoke. I simply can not be around people who are smoking in a closed room. Some people are offended by that, but they are not my friends. I have friends who I love who smoke, and they respect my health and my wishes enough to NEVER smoke in my presence. It can be difficult for me at times, because at various Tori gatherings there tends to be alot of smokers. Since I can not sit in the smoking section of restaurants or be indoors with smokers, I am sometimes forced to miss certain events. I have no choice. That makes me kinda sad and frustrated at the same time. But I know my body. I know what it is like to struggle just to breathe. I am shocked that anyone would risk damaging their lungs. Having breathing problems is one of the worst things that can happen to you. If you have healthy lungs, please don't take them for granted. I would give my left arm for a good set of lungs! So I am pulling for you Laura! Yours in Tori, Mikewhy ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Michael L. Whitehead mikewhy@iglou.com My Dent In The Tori Amos Net Universe => http://www.aye.net/~mikewhy/toriamos.html "Moses I know, I know you've seen fire, but you've never seen fire until you've seen Pele blow..." Tori Amos ------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 18:48:52 -0500 (EST) From: Fragments1@aol.com To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org Subject: wrong. ...you know..i just got off the phone with a dear friend..her & i grew into tori together....... we both agree...she had to talk to me in low, soothing tones at first..but.....this is more or less what she said: if tori refused to continue her life, she'd be doing us EWF, and herself, more harm then good. by continuing her life [whether she's merely dating a cute brit or married to one], she's proving her message true-she's said that by recording what's become "the trilogy", and doing BFP, she reclaimed a part of her that was long gone. and she was able to get up, wipe herself off, wash her hands, pee, and continue with her life & her music.... it's just..i don't know. when i first read the interview where she stated that during the le days she walked off the stage into eric's arms, i felt betrayed. simply because i indentified with tori more then sarah or anyone else because she *radiated* both pain and healing and billions of other emotions..the metaphorical tempest in a teacup. but then i was forced to look at exactly what stef forced me to look at-a part of healing is continuing on with life. two quotes stef passed on that really helped: "hell, even PATTI SMITH got married!" and "at least the guy's british!" ...but....tori hasn't fallen in my eyes. she's just become..more..human. HUMAN being the key word here. a HUMAN being capable of giving, as well as recieving, love. a woman who got up every night and pounded away on a piano her story of violation, pain, and victimization. and tori's always said she refuses to be a victim. i've realized she's really not betraying her message..she's continuing it. if i think about it, by saying what i did, i'm really no better then those who condemned me for who i used to be, and finding happiness with michelle. i meAN....i realize that, even with someone, you still have moments of intense pleAsure and intense pain. they're just more equally balanced. beth said it best [and i thank her for holding my hand and forcing me to look at a lot of this]:"she's on a journey, and she's invited us to watch" yeah, i realize that, to those of you who are so concerned with looking/feeling stupid that you never let tori touch you, this all sound really pointless. but i know that a few folks let her into their hearts...and know what i'm talking about. this is for them. -ventrue "Nothing's gonna stop me from floating." ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 18:57:09 From: <natstat@usa.net> To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org Subject: I'm breathless. All I can say is wow. I just read ventrue's poetry and I just don't know how to deal with all the emotions and shit that he has reevoked from inside me. It was just awesome...and I think I will need a few days to recover from what has felt like having the wind knocked out of me. Very rarely do I feel like I cannot express my feelings...but this is one of them. Jorge...I can feel for your embarrassing story. Ms. Natalie is notoriously accident-prone. I think I can top your story. I was walking from anthro with this hot guy that I have a crush on and my best friend. I got embarassed or something about something, so I "pretended" to fall forward. However, I was unable to "recover" from my foward lean (I think because my backpack kinda kept me leaning forward) and I ended up rolling over and my head was in the bushes and the rest of me was on the sidewalk. So I am lying there with my bag over my head and all I can hear is people laughing and my hands burn. So I start to say "Fuck that shit" over and over and I hear someone mutter something about being embarrassed. When I finally have dealt with the pain and shock, I demand my best friend to help me up. She tries, but can't so I get up myself. Within a few moments I am informed that my antho professor (who also happens to be one of the few Jesuit priests at my school) walked by when I was on the ground yelling "Fuck that shit" and said, "Wow. Natalie must really be embarrassed." So after my friends told me that story, I was really embarrassed...and the reason no one helped me at first was because they were laughing too hard (in fact, this other girl in my class, who is 27, had tears in her eyes from laughing so hard. My elbow got a really bad injury, which is just slowly healing. Never again, I say!!! Anyway, I want to thank you Bethey for your words of wisdom yet again. In responding to my comments about you (although you think they are sweet, I think they are just facts), you became nude in front of us for a brief moment, yet again, and this time you had a big impact on me. You are a very wise person and I usually take your words in high esteem. But what you said about how you have finally just gotten control of your life and how all the other 18 years while you were "on your own" you were living to please others, was like words from a saint. I have been very needy recently...like I have been doing things I haven't really wanted to do, yet because I have wanted to please others I have done them. As a result, I have felt even worse about myself and haven't gotten anything that I need. I am generally a self-less person and I love being that way. But after doing certain "things" with two guys...one who I thought was a good friend and who wants to be a priest (gag gag) and the other a real jerk who I know is a jerk, but i cna't stay away from even though I hate him...I just want to crawl under a rock and never come out. I thought that being held by a guy again would make me feel better, but it didn't and I realized that what I really want is someone to like me for who me, Natalie Allegra Sue Watson, is on the inside, not cause I am a cute, sensitive, caring, "easy" person...cause I am not the latter and I have fooled myself into believing I was...and now I feel like shit. But having you, Bethey, talk about your life and how wonderful it is now was like words sent from a divine source straight to me. It's like you were telling me not to make the same mistakes as you, not to be something you are not, not to let other's control you, and to realize that true love and joy can only be found in yourself...not in a guy's bed. The sad thing is is that I am only 19, yet I feel like I am already doomed to a life of stupid mistakes. I am too young to be doing shit like I am doing...I think I got spoiled by my first boyfriend ever, in which that relationship lasted 1-1/2 years...and was intense...like I was pretending I was ten years older and ready for the commitment that I thought I wanted...not necessarily marriage, but just a commitment to always be there for me. So, I am going to take you as my role model, dear Mother Bethey, and try to live by your lessons. Thanks so much for your words of wisdom. Even if you jsut wrote it to help get things off of your chest, I want you to know that it helped me a lot and I will always love you for that. Can you be my honorary mother? See...my mom is mentally ill, so I am more of a mother to her than she is to me. My dad is a prick whom I haven't seen since I was four. I was raised by my grandmother, who I think is also mentally ill. And two years ago I lived with my 34-year-old aunt, but she never was like a mother cause I was almost 18...plus she has her own problems and we are too much alike, so she has touble not getting pissed at me when she sees her worst points being expressed in me. Then, last year I went off to college in another state where my older sis was, but she was more of a best friend and I was trying to be all adult and not need a parent. And now I am back here...25 minutes away from my mentally ill family (mom, grandma, and aunt) yet I talk to them maybe once a month if that about dumb shit...so would you be my honorary mom? I think I need that. Sorry this post is so long. I have more I want to say, but no more time, cause I have to get to babysittin. So, I just want to say hi to Keith...check out my subject line...it actually meant something this time (no I wasn't referring to the past 1-1/2 weeks, I was referring to ventrue's poems). Also, hi to Danica, who also writes excellent poetry and whom I love very much and whom I will go to her web page the very next time I log on and have time to read poems...very soon I hope. And hi to Jo, who is another sweetheart...You guys don't even know how much you have added to my life these past five months. And hi to Violet cause I haven't said that in a long tiem and I am just very grateful to her right now because it is because of her that I have gotten to know all above-mentioned and all the other wonderful people on RDTRN that I didn't mention as I have to close to now. I love you all. Love in Tori, Natalie ____________________________________________________________________ Get free e-mail and a permanent address at http://www.netaddress.com ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Tue, 24 Feb 1998 21:35:19 -0800 From: Roxanne Rieske <risky@indy.net> To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org Subject: Heyyyyyyyyyyy another indy.net'er! Wow! I'm not alone anymore! I'm in Greenfield..I know some Shultz but I doubt I know you. Or do I? Do I know you? :o) Roxanne risky@indy.net > Date: Thu, 19 Feb 1998 20:32:08 -0500 > From: brad shultz <talula@indy.net> > To: rdtrn@torithoughts.org > Subject: Live in NY > > Grey Ear Brad delurks. Hey all. I received the Tori Live in NY tape in > the mail today. It's wonderful. My wife Marsha and I watched it > tonight. WOW!! > > ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o [top] Date: Wed, 25 Feb 1998 01:24:48 -0500 To: Kim Payne (sistrshp23@aol.com) From: Beth Coulter <betheqt@voicenet.com> Subject: RDT 'zine Cc: rdtrn@torithoughts.org Hi! Just a quick note, Tom Richards was pub of "Upside Down" which is no longer supported or sanctioned by Tori. RDT is pub by Richard & Missy Caldwell and issue #11 is due out any day. Just wanted to make sure there is no confusion about the two. The two sanctioned publications for Tori Amos are "Really Deep Thoughts aka RDT", and "Take to the Sky" which is pub in England. Upside Down no longer exists. Fairy Blessings, Bethey ---------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm OK when everything's not OK cause it's the Fairies Revenge they say and I have always been a Fairy *************************************************************** Know your Teachers, Learn all you Can, Then go Teach what you have Learned. That is the True Secret to Life. Beth Coulter ---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o *** Copies of limited edition Tori poster "Siren" still available *** Renowned artist Bob Masse, who has been creating rock posters for over 30 years, has just completed a very special new Tori poster just for us, the fans. Printed in a limited edition of only 300, this will be a collector's item one day. Bob has chosen to make this available only through the Internet, instead of stores or galleries. To find out more, please visit the RDTRN site at: http://www.slip.net/~violet/archives/Thoughts_archive.html Or, to reserve a copy of this poster, send a request to: <ahorn@soundcom.net> There are also very limited prints of the DDI tour poster still available for sale through Alisdair's site as well. (That poster is just *so* gorgeous.) Violet xoxox o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o o-o-o *** This Is A Subliminal Message digest *** To Write PRIVATE mail to me, my PERSONAL address is: <violet@torithoughts.org> To post messages to this list: <rdtrn@torithoughts.org> To SUBSCRIBE or UNSUBSCRIBE: Send mail to <rdtrn-request@torithoughts.org> with either "subscribe thoughts" OR "unsubscribe thoughts" in the body of the message. RDTRN SITE AND ARCHIVES: http://www.slip.net/~violet/archives/Thoughts_archive.html Other Tori mailing lists: * Precious Things (on-topic discussion of Tori and her music): bounce version <precious-things-request@smoe.org> OR digest version <precious-things-digest-request@smoe.org> (put the word "subscribe" in the body of your message) * ToriNews (strictly time-sensitive info about Tori -- no chat): send a message to <torinews-request@smoe.org>. The body of your request should contain ONLY the word "subscribe" and nothing more. * Tori-Boot (bootleg info, trades, sales): to subscribe, send a message to <majordomo@world.std.com> The body of your message should read EXACTLY LIKE THIS: subscribe tori-boot * Tori Amos Quote of the Day (self-explanaTori): to subscribe, send a request to <elizabeth@muderick.com>. * The Philosophy of Tori (words of Tori wizdom to ponder): to subscribe, send a request to <toriphoria@aol.com>. * The News Group for Tori is rec.music.tori-amos. _ . /\ , _ _ ( _ )_ {Oo\{o\ .=. ( ` )_ (_ _(_ ,) {o: \:.\ / \ ( ) `) | {O:' \:.-'_.-\_)____ (_ (_ . _) _) \ _ / {o:. /`~('-./-----.\ -= (_) =- }o: // /| `/\ ( ) / \ {O:'// /-' /\/\ ( ` ) . ) | }o-/( <___ \'/ /\/\/\ (_, _( ,_)_) /o./ ;--._)====* -\/\/\/ `"`\ \ /.\ `""` \ \ \ \ wWWWw wWWWw /`\ ) vVVVv (___) wWWWw (___) vVVVv |/| | vVVVv (___) ~O~ (___) vVVVv ~H~ (___) vVVVv _// \| (___) ~H~ \| ~U~ (___) |/ ~T~ (___) | / || \~T~/ \| \ |/ \| / \~G~/ \| \ |/ \~S~/ |/ / | \\|// \\|// \\|// \\|/// \\|// \\|// \\\|/// \\|// ` `\| ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ` thanks for visiting this pretty garden

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